Leadership is a Demonstration

Every leader is unique in personality and style, bringing different strengths, weaknesses, skills, experience, and perspective to their role. When working with leadership teams, I often invite them to self-identify in one of four categories.

If you are a leader, or you work for a leader, which of these four broad styles do you most recognize?

• Results-Oriented (Directive, decisive, outcome-focused, action-oriented, evidence-based
• Relationship-Centered (Collaborative, emotionally intelligent, inclusive, connecting, empowering)
• Internally-Centered (Self-aware, authentic, resilient, calm, consistent)
• Visionary (Innovative, inspiring, passionate, engaging, influencing)

While leaders tend to exhibit a favored style, the ability to harness and employ different style qualities in changing circumstances is more important for long-term success.

Leadership is a demonstration. Not just of style or personality, but a demonstration of character and courage. It is seen and known by others regardless of our intentions.

True leadership looks inward to guide outward by able example, leaving vanity, control, and self-interest at the door.

Powerful leadership demonstrates courage through bravery:

• Bravery to bear the truth even when the truth is difficult.
• Bravery to stand in the truth, while pointing toward a brighter horizon and leading forward in that direction.
• Bravery to call forth community and connectedness, through and including the differences.
• Bravery to challenge all members of the team or the community to participate toward common interests and inter-dependent goals.
• Bravery to risk making a mistake for the sake of forwarding action in the direction of that bright horizon.

SPOTLIGHT LEADERS OF THE WEEK

This past week, 3 of the leaders that I coached demonstrated vastly different styles and approaches to leading their teams. It would be easy to read these descriptions and judge good or bad, right or wrong, effective or not effective. As “normal” human beings, we tend to jump to value judgments and reactions automatically. When we are in a reactive or judging state, it is hard to access open-mindedness, curiosity or wonder, the bridge-builders of healthy relationship dynamics.

Being an executive coach is a privilege, and it bears great responsibility. To be useful to leaders, and by extension their teams, it is imperative that I maintain neutrality, suspend judgment, and listen for what is beneath the challenges and the resulting behaviors of both the leader and their stakeholders. This presence requires 3 things:

• self-awareness (to know, catch and pause my own value triggers)
• investigative curiosity (what are the experiences, fears, drivers)
• potency of belief (that beyond self-protection and self-promotion, there is inherent goodness)

I invite you to “try on” this perspective as you reflect on these spotlighted leadership scenarios. Suspend judgment and “knowing” and notice what emerges.

Leader One: “Casey” - CEO, early-stage leadership career, industrial services company

Challenge/Struggle:

“We have been building a culture of curiosity, respect, and collaboration and everyone seemed to be on board and in good spirits. But even with that, people don’t seem to be dialed in or focused at all. It almost feels like when the head coach loses the locker room. Maybe we have an organization issue. Maybe we are really distracted and messy and if we get things to a more organized state as a company, things will improve. Dealing with distracted employees is hard. I’m trying not to blame myself, but it’s hard not to point at myself or the environment that I’ve created, because I am the leader.”

Actions and Assumptions:

Casey asked the managers of all departments for input. “What do you guys think of this?”

The common response from managers was, “We look really busy. People say they are busy.”

Casey’s response: “I know we look busy, but are we busy? Or are we cluttered, not organized, and distracted?” (This is the powerful question we might all ask ourselves and our teams…)

Casey is working hard to improve his leadership effectiveness and in particular his reaction and communication when frustrated. Based on the conversations with his managers, he took a harder look at the entire organization and the facilities. He then enrolled the managers with the project of significant clean up and organization of everything from supplies to equipment, offices to warehouses. He was surprised as people eagerly engaged in the challenge and even more so, he was surprised by the uplift in people’s energy.

The results of the project were phenomenal. And it led to a deeper conversation.

Applied Curiosity:

I asked Casey to explore what else might be going on in the world of these employees. How might that be contributing to the challenge of employees “looking busy, saying they are busy, and even saying they are over-extended”?

Upon stepping back with curiosity, Casey recognized that people may be experiencing fear and anxiety about job security, the uncertainty of the economy, and their value to the company. They may be less busy in some areas, but their fear prevents honest conversations with managers and initiative to generate ideas and take new actions, because it would make them vulnerable.

With this perspective, Casey was able to lead an open and honest dialogue with the managers, and ultimately at the company all-hands. He shared more information about the company’s state, critical positions that are in recruitment, and most importantly, his confidence in the continued success of this long-operating business. This communication both tempered some fear, and it generated more commitment from employees to contribute wherever they could.

Casey’s growth goal:

Casey’s leadership goal from this scenario is to maintain open, honest, transparent communication with his teams. Even when there isn’t a visible problem. It will take concerted effort for Casey, who’s natural style is to focus on sales results and his own tasks. He communicates directly without a filter, focuses on solving problems (even when that stifles growth in others) and assumes people will do what is “obviously” expected of their position, without clear priorities and accountabilities.

Casey’s next step actions:

• Shifting the structure of his 1:1’s with managers to focus the meetings on significant wins, key challenges or blockers, and clear asks for support as needed (and not update meetings or socializing).
• Communicating consistently and transparently at each monthly all-hands meeting, aligned with weekly communication with management.

Casey is a joy to coach because of his own openness and willingness to learn and to change. And what is refreshing is to experience a 40-year-old white male that can be honest with himself, and humble enough to try new things.

Leader Two: “Robin” - VP, mid-stage leadership career, Biotechnology Company

Challenge/Struggle:

The strategic direction of the company is shifting, which will likely result in the reduction or possible elimination of a key therapeutic area under this leader’s domain. While the timing and decisions about which area(s) will be affected are uncertain, Robin is navigating communication, transparency and inclusion with her leadership team. She has shared the known facts with her team, but her leadership style is highly analytical, risk averse, and conflict averse. Her preference is to continue “business as usual” until a clear directive is made, avoiding unnecessary work, worry, and potential employee turnover. She hopes that the strategic shift may not ultimately materialize; however, the risk is that she and her team may lose influence power through inaction and that the perception of her ability to lead through change gets questioned upline.

Actions and Assumptions:

Robin has asked each of her direct reports to think about what reductions they would propose in their area if required, but she is not asking them to think about what reductions they would propose if they were “in her shoes”. This would require they step out of their own domain view and operate as a unified leadership team focused on highest level impact overall.

Robin’s team is frustrated with the changing narrative and the absence of clear decision making and direction. They are all strong leaders and they each have strong viewpoints; however, they are also part of a larger collection. Based on Robin’s communication so far, they are all assuming that they may need to reduce in their area, but that their area would not be eliminated.

Robin assumes that if she called her team forth to think about decision making from a higher perspective, they may realize that an elimination would make sense and that in turn could lead to conflict and disruption.

Applied Curiosity:

I asked Robin to step back and consider the opportunity for growth and development of her leaders and herself. What might be possible in a best-case scenario? What if she knew that like most employees, these leaders most wanted to contribute to meaningful success? What if they surprised her and were able to let go of territory in favor of changing the world?

Upon stepping back, Robin realized that she had already decided which area she would remove and that it was a strong possibility. Her own discomfort with the thought of facing that leader any sooner than necessary was holding her back from leaning into her own team fully.  The perspective was eye-opening, but the risk still felt too high.

Robin’s growth goal:

Robin’s leadership growth goal is to challenge her own assumptions about her team and her organization, and to put the collective needs above her own fear of losing control, stepping into another less familiar aspect of leadership style. That will include clear and confident decision-making, increased personal transparency, and increased trust of her team.

Robin’s next step actions:

• Invite her team’s input into the appropriate level of planning and preparation necessary to be ready with proposed solutions (including worst-case scenarios) when requested.
• Ask her team for feedback about her communication style and suggestions for improvement.

Robin is incredibly intelligent and accomplished. Like so many high achievers and perfectionists, her own standards and fear of failure are the chief antagonists in the way of her path to excellence.

Leader Three: “Blake” - Founder & CEO, late-stage leadership career, Global Non-Profit

Challenge/Struggle:

Blake enjoyed a 24-year successful career at a Fortune-50 technology company, responsible for a $600M budget and receiving many awards of excellence. In his second and current career, he founded a global non-profit that helps underrepresented young adults in over 100 countries to secure employment. The organization has grown exponentially the past five years and Blake is questioning whether his own leadership limits might stand in the way of continued success. Can he grow and develop his skills in areas of highest importance?

•  public speaking
•  decision making
•  clear directive communication
•  organizational development
•  holding accountability

Blake is clear of his number one priority, and that is the sustained growth and viability of this non-profit and its mission delivery, with or without him at the helm.

Actions and Assumptions:

Blake has taken the action of engaging a coach for himself and a couple of key leaders. He has also made the commitment to invest time and resources into the development of his management team’s cohesion and effectiveness.

He is looking squarely at his own competencies and gaps, along with the competencies and gaps of his management team. He understands that the next phase of growth may require some people changes.

Blake has uncovered three underlying assumptions that he holds for himself:

• that to be good at something (like public speaking), he must measure up to the most successful comparisons
• a shadow belief that his own (powerful) story and his own truth is not important, and in fact should not be shared, because he is a middle-aged white man with privilege
• that because he has a different leadership style (relationship-centered) than what he believes is required for ultimate success (results-oriented) based on his 24-year first career, he can’t be the leader for this organization long-term

Applied Curiosity:

I asked Blake to step back and think about the power and impact of his personal story and how it aligns to the mission and passion of his company. If he were someone hearing this story, as an integrated part of the journey to creating this non-profit, how would he feel?

Additionally, he was asked to challenge his own assumptions about powerful and impactful communication and public speaking. Are audiences only inspired by perfect words, timing, humor, and charisma? Or are there audiences that are inspired by authenticity, truth telling, and even a bit of vulnerability?

Upon stepping back, Blake realized that his story is an important part of the company’s story.  He was making assumptions about what other people would think of him and how other people would judge him because of how he was judging himself. With that awareness, new possibilities emerged. He shifted his willingness to own not just the company, but his significance in its growth, success, and sustainability.

Blake’s growth goal:

Blakes leadership growth goal is to improve his executive presence overall, which will in turn support all the priorities listed above. He will be a better and more impactful speaker and leader, and he will bring more clarity and aligned communication to all.  

Blake’s next step actions:

• Curate his personal story to incorporate into his leading presentation.
• Determine what level of professional speaking skill development he needs.
• Leverage the strengths of his leadership style, while increasing directive action.

Blake is committed to his word and to his mission. What makes him a stand-out leader, is his willingness to be open and honest not just with his coach, but with himself.

Leadership is a demonstration. Not just of style or personality, but a demonstration of character and courage.

This is a time when we all need to bring forth our leadership, our character and our courage. As individuals, parents, community members, advocates, managers, and leaders, we must take the lead, inviting community and connectedness even through our differences.

We need to find the threads that connect us as human beings; to seek empathy in our hearts even when we have not walked in the shoes of the other, trusting that in their shoes, we would be having their experience. If we had been on their journey, watched what they watched, listened to what they listened to, believed what they believe, we would be there too.

Leadership is a demonstration. It’s not about changing people. It’s about changing the pattern or approach to build connection. Empathetic connection builds safety, safety builds trust, and trust unleashes collective power that can be used for good.  

Ask yourself, “where can I build more connection today and where are the leaders that are bravely moving in that direction?” Follow them.